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The Positive side of negative motivation

The Positive side of Negative Motivation

The positive side of negative Motivation

The positive side of negative motivation
You have to embrace the negativity, the cynicism, the criticism of others so you can control how that fire burns. Fire can destroy but it can also forge new creations. The more you can withstand, and the sooner you take action, the greater your chances of getting back in the race. – Tim S. Grover, Winning: The Unforgiving Race to Greatness

The positive side of Negative Motivation

Just like a matchstick ignites fire, we need some sort of external force to ignite motivation inside us.

A thrust to climb the life-ladder.

There is a gap between where you are and where you want to be.

And to close it, you need consistent motivation.

The fact that our goals are on the other side of our comfort zone, makes the path cumbersome and it looks like an intangible project.

We have the desire, but we do not have enough grit to pursue it.

We visualize goals but because we do not feel ready and are not backed with enough inherent drive to override any sort of obstacles, we are constantly on the lookout for motivation.

We want someone or something to fill us with an extraordinary power that can never run short.

We believe only if we are consistently resourced with motivation, we can slog through.

Motivation is like a springboard that helps you jump when you fail to walk further.

 

But today, I am not going to discuss about the positive motivation that our popular culture has given the most attention and importance to.

A reward-based encouragement method which we commonly call positive motivation is something comfortable.

It’s the safe way to help you achieve goals.

It does not guarantee you success always, but it assures the safety of your emotions. A positive motivation is well-guarded and does not disturb your inner state of mind.

You receive positive uplifting words and an empowering atmosphere to build your higher self for those higher goals.

But living in an environment, where we cannot control what sort of motivation we will receive from the world around us, we need to prepare ourselves for the one that we fear and do not anticipate.

The Negative Motivation!

 

So, in this blog, I want to give you a deep dive into, “The negative motivation”.

Before I tell you the positive story behind the negative Motivation, I want you to read this twice, thrice and a lot more times until you believe it.

Someone telling you, “You can do it” does not always mean you will succeed in doing it and someone telling you, “You cannot do it” does not confirm that you will fail at it.

 

 

Positive motivation is not enough when Goals are hard.

What you don’t have and wish having it, becomes your goal.

The one that your current version does not afford.

You have to get better to get something better.

  • Abandon the comfort zone and
  • Accept the discomfort that the goal demands you.

But what often happens is, positive motivation might help you to start but when you move further and deeper into the process, chances are to fall back into the same comfort zone.

 Even if you had positive motivation, holding on to it all through the way becomes intangible.

Your desire to achieve something gets replaced by the comfort and ease of sitting back when it gets harder to accomplish.

 

No matter how desperately you wanted to achieve it, the difficult ride makes you succumb to it, and you start compromising with your goal.

 Because the truth is, we are wired to feel better in a comfortable space and anything that is outside of that realm of comfort feels threatening or scary.

The new level is unfamiliar, and it needs you to bring a lot of transformation.

So, when you fail to stand tall amidst the struggle it demands, negative motivation can become a game changer.

Positive motivation is about encouragement and inspiration whereas negative motivation involves using negative emotions to drive action or attitude change.

 

 

Negative motivation is the game changer

Negative Motivation

 Sometimes the reward for winning is not enough to strive for the winning, at times you need fear of falling back into the same place where you started.

 

If you fear being stuck at position A, your mind will push you hard to reach position B.

Negative Motivation is about evoking emotions or feelings that are uncomfortable and undesirable to create a positive force that aims to drive you to take action (from position A) to avoid returning to position A (a state where these emotions will be at their peak).

It is fueled by fear or the avoidance of undesirable outcomes, which can prompt you to take immediate action to avoid the negative consequences.

This means when you feel Negative emotions like fear, failure, regret, pain, rejection, guilt, humiliation etc. in your current situation, it creates so much discomfort that it prompts you to work and overcome them and stops you coming back to the same situation.

 

The first encounter with Negative motivation can look threatening and if you are not aware of how to approach it with caution, it can create a toxic or unhealthy effect.

We cannot stop these negative emotions, but we can channel them right to get the best out of them.

 

 

Channelize Negative Motivation in your favor

Victor Frankl says: Everything can be taken from a man but one thing, the last of human freedom to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s way.

This guides us to understand that we cannot control the negative things that happen to us, but we have all the control to channel them in our favor.

And no one can steal this freedom of choice from us to look at the positive side of the picture.

 

When you encounter negative emotions, it isn’t a bad place to be in.

It’s the place that exposes your weak side and pushes all the negative thoughts to the surface where you can feel them and see them.

This creates a need inside you to safeguard yourself from these emotions by mending your situation and not falling back into the same trap.

What looks like destructive has a huge potential to make you constructive.

Just like in the bad times, your real potential is unleashed, similarly, when negative emotions loom over you, it is a chance to build your immunity against them.

 

 

The Two Choices:

You can either use Negative motivation or let Negative Motivation use you

You can choose to be a victim, or you can build yourself into a warrior in the face of negative motivation.

Imagine yourself sitting inside a comfortable room and relaxing. You are binge-watching your favorite web series with a handful of chips and some great drinks.

Suddenly you feel the room starts getting shaky and fear begins to penetrate you. Within some time, the shaking increases and you feel restless.

The fear builds up more.

At this point will you continue to sit in this comfortable room which no longer feels comfortable to you?

Or you will try running out of this room and save your life?

You have two choices: let the fear damage you or use this fear to save yourself from the bigger damage.

This fear was a signal which prompted you to quicken and take action.

Had this feeling of fear not been tangible, you would have been doomed by something catastrophic.

Just like fever is not a disease but a signal that intimates something is wrong inside your body, and you need to take some action against it, similarly negative motivation is a drive that pushes you to take stronger steps.

 

 

 

What happens when you use Negative Motivation Positively?

We hate to feel and experience negative motivation but the fact that we cannot control it, we look for ways to handle it best.

Negative motivation is a powerful tool that is designed to make you achieve things or save yourself from horrific situations by creating tension in your mind.

The tension might look scary, but it creates an internal force that builds you to take action.

The quote “Prevention is better than cure” depicts the role of negative motivation in the best way.

During the times of COVID, there were millions of people who suffered from this life-threatening fatal infection which created fear in everyone.

This fear became the driving force to take necessary measures and caution to prevent themselves from infection.

People feared losing their lives and this pushed them to walk the extra mile and took the hardest steps for prevention.

There could have been more deaths if negative motivation was not at work.

 

 

 

What did I do with my Negative Motivation?

I have come to terms with using negative motivation in my favor.

When I started writing along with my job and showed a keen interest towards this baby that had just been born, I got some negative responses from people around me.

They could not perceive choosing passion as a career and showed their negativity towards it.

There was a flippant expression towards my new dream.

I was starting as an amateur with a meagre confidence and the negative motivation of people was enough to strangle it.

What was already hard and challenging, became doubtful as well. It filled me with insecurity and a lack of courage to continue to hold my baby and grow it.

I would have quit if I had not taken a chance to mentor myself and look at the undercurrents of this negative motivation.

On the surface, it looked bad and negative but deep down there was a positive message for me.

New things are going to demand a New Me.

Not just to grow this baby but how to channel this negative motivation to grow it the best way.

When people are negative, it does not speak anything about us but how they feel about our situation. 

You have to understand that people cannot visualize the butterfly you are when they see you in your caterpillar stage.

I thought of using this negativity as a precursor to dive deeper into my baby and give the best possible resources to grow it.

And when You become the butterfly and fly away high, the same people start chasing you looking at the beauty you’ve grown into.

 

Happiness is not when life is perfect but when you can move through day-to-day occasional challenges with enough fluidity and the reason you are not held back by yourself. ~ Martha Washington

 

 

How my Cats respond to negative motivation

I have been looking after 3 cats that my brother and sister-in-law brought home a long time ago.

And it’s been a great experience observing their behaviors and emotions.

I had countless life lessons just by observing them.

So, one of them was a brilliant way of showing a positive response to negative motivation.

Cats do not rely on you for safety no matter how much you love them. The fight for themselves.

The two big emotions I noticed in them are:

Greed and Fear.

So, when I feed my cats with milk, I see this emotion of “Greed” at its peak. They are big-time gluttons for milk products.

But now while they have this milk, they are alert as well. They keep their attention on anything scary that can attack them.

As we have dogs around, the cats are always cautious.

And if the dog comes close even while they are having their best cuisine, fear takes over greed.

They use their fear to save themselves from any possible threat.

This makes me wonder how even in animals, the negative motivation is always at work, the positive work.

 

 

 

The positive side of Negative Motivation

Is the fear going to drown you or push you to become a swimmer?

 

The purpose of Negative motivation is to create positive results which a comfortable space of positive motivation fails, at times.

Our minds are wired for ease, and we are entrenched in our comfort zones.

We repel what is hard and we get attracted towards what is easy.

But the truth is, as much as we need positive motivation to excel, we need negative motivation to not fall back.

The fear of losing prepares us for the winning.

5 positive things to look at when you face a negative motivation:

 

Immediate action:

It’s like putting off the gas flame suddenly when you see the boiling milk spill over.

Negative motivation serves just like the boiling milk. It is fueled by fear or the avoidance of undesirable outcomes which prompts you to take immediate action.

The fear of getting things worse pushes you to take action before they really become.

 

 

Escalates the Awareness: 

You have an exam tomorrow and you have an exam the next month.

Your mind will function completely different in the two scenarios.

The fear of tomorrow’s exam makes you aware of the potential failure and you become more attentive to your actions.

 

 

Re-evaluation:

You have been suffering because of your emotional patterns.

But when you confront the potential negative impact of your current behavior, it helps you to re-evaluate your choices and make necessary adjustments.

 

 

Readiness for competition:

The fear of falling behind fills you with competitive spirit and it can escalate your performance.

 

 

Breaks the mental barriers of the comfort zone:

Your home is messy, the dishes are cluttered, dust is piled up on your furniture and the reason is: 

You are feeling lazy!

Your comfort zone is the block.

It is hindering you every time from taking the initiative of cleaning.

Suddenly you get a call from your husband, telling you that one of his friends is coming over along with his family for dinner.

There is a rush of thoughts and laziness flies away from the window.

This one call served like a magical pill that made you a superwoman in no time.

 

 

Negative motivation is helpful only if you use it and do not let it use you.

We cannot change what we go through, but we have all the authority to change our attitude towards it.

“Anyone can have a good day. The question is, what do you do on a bad day? That’s when you’re being tested. In a very tangible sense, a bad day shows your innermost essence more than a good day.” – Arthur Golden

 

 


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Hi! This is Sarita Mian.

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